There’s a common misconception about sex after menopause. Many people think that women’s libido diminishes, or that sex becomes less pleasurable. But the truth is, sex after menopause can lead to women having “the greatest sex lives on earth,” according to the director of San Diego Sexual Medicine at Alvarado Hospital. Let’s look at some of the reasons why that is.
- Freedom. Menopause has many unpleasant aspects, like hot flashes, but one undeniably pleasant part? Freedom from worrying about pregnancy. You’re free to enjoy life without pads, tampons, IUDs, diaphragms, pills, or condoms (if you’re with a long-term partner). Not worrying about the risk of pregnancy gives women the chance to enjoy sex for the great experience it can be.
- Lack of inhibition. Many women become less inhibited as they age, which means they’re able to be more comfortable with who they are. This comfort actually improves sexual functioning and performance — and it doesn’t hurt that age has taught us a few things, either. Most of us know by now what it is we want from a partner sexually, but now we’re not as afraid of speaking up and articulating our desires. If you know what you want, ask for it.
- Increased desire. While there are some who believe changes in hormones will make women less desirous of sex after menopause, that might not be true. Birth control can often influence a woman’s sexual desire, so, without those pesky pills, you might just feel a resurgence of your sexual energy. If not, there are always hormone therapies (like ones that include testosterone) that can help with that.
- Lube. Vaginal dryness is one undeniably unpleasant part of menopause, but luckily for us, there’s a simple solution. Lube! There are so many different types of lubricants available, so sex after menopause can actually be a perfect time to experiment and discover new sensations. Some of these are designed to increase pleasure by dilating blood vessels.
- Problems are easily fixed. As with the simple solution of incorporating lube into your sex life to fix vaginal dryness, other potential problems are also easily fixed. If it’s a partner’s performance issues (like erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation), there are plenty of solutions. Consider other forms of sexual stimulation that don’t involve intercourse, or try incorporating sex toys like vibrators into your sexual experiences. Men who are more mature (and thus prone to performance issues) are usually more open to this type of solution.
- Partners are more in sync. One of the good things about men’s sexual potency changing with age is that men may take a bit longer to become aroused. How is that a good thing, you ask? Well, many women complain about feeling they take too long to experience pleasure. As men begin to take longer, there’s finally an equal playing field, so game on! This is a time for you and your partner to explore all the ways you can enjoy each other’s bodies. So, enjoy it!